Days of Thankfulness

So I meant to do 30 Days of Thankfulness on Facebook, but NaNoWriMo kind of consumed my life. 😛 So, I have collected all of my thanks here. Here are my 30 days of thankfulness. I apologize in advance if you don’t like cheese, because at times I just couldn’t help being a little cheesy. 😉

Day 1 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for my life. Sometimes it is wonderful, sometimes it seriously sucks, and usually it is messy or complicated or both. But it’s mine. And as someone who has done the whole death thing a few times, breathing is a gift, and time is a blessing or luck depending on your word choice preferences. And I am thankful for every day I have, even those messy, sucky days. Because there is something seriously beautiful in all that mess.

Day 2 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for my husband, Roy. I don’t believe in fate or meant-to-be’s or anything like that, but somehow my husband is the exception. I went through a lot my 25th year – I even died. After battling an epic fight just to exist (two diseases and multi-organ failure) I won, and then I turned right around and did some much needed work on myself. I worked through all of the crap that used to hold me back and a few weeks later – there he was. I really do think of him as my reward for making it through what I did. I wrote a poem years earlier about the perfect guy, concluding he didn’t exist – the creepy part is that the perfect guy in the poem actually describes my husband perfectly, down to the physical characteristics, background, personality… it was like I was clairvoyant or something. Roy is the reason I smile every morning, the reason I sigh contentedly for no reason at all. He can always make me laugh, especially when I don’t want to because he’s done something not so funny, and he always makes me feel safe. With him I can cry without shame, love without fear – he makes me better than I could ever be on my own. He has seen me at my best, my worst and all of the daily in between. He is my best friend and the only person I feel like I can be completely myself with 24/7. He is my perfect fit, my complete opposite in every way and yet together we just fit, and we complete one another; he fills in what I lack, as I do in him. Together we can do anything. Infinity plus one – no take backs my love. Ever ever.

Day 3 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for my ultimate BFFS: Crystal and Chase. I am thankful for all of my friends, but these two need a special shout out – I mean seriously. I have been friends with Crystal for more than ten years, we met my sophomore year in college. Crystal is amazing, she has gotten me through my darkest times, been there in sickness (as in she was my medical power of attorney in 2009 when it looked like that was it) and in health, served as my rock, my favorite dancing partner and someone to be silly with. Crystal is the get-it-done friend and the whatever-you-need friend. She is my best friend and I love her like a sister. Chase is different. He is my fun friend, the make-you-laugh friend, the greatest heart and loyal friend. He has this knack for knowing exactly what I need and having the best delivery ever. He can always make me laugh, even when it is the furthest thing from my mind. We have only known each other for six years, which seems crazy. We developed our own shorthand after the first time we met. I have never had that instant clicking with someone than I have with him – ten minutes felt like ten years. And he just fit into my life. (Okay so my husband was also this way, so the only platonic case I guess.) Crystal and Chase will always be my Maid of Honor and Best Man (and they were at my wedding) forever and ever! Best Friends Forever! ♥

Day 4 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for my dog, and the best fur baby ever, Angel. Angel is very special to me. I found her abandoned when she was just a few days old. I bottle fed her, nursed her back to health and I was the first thing she ever saw (she didn’t open her eyes until Day #3). I may have saved her that day, but she has been saving me ever since. When going out on dates she would bark at every guy and do circle around me as if creating some kind of force field. When she met Roy on our first date she danced for him (on two legs she twirled) and begged for his attention. It was the first and only time she was good with a new guy right away. It was love at first lick. Just like the times when I would cry alone with her, and she would lick my face to get me to stop, she is always looking out for me. I love her so much more than I ever have any other pet. She is my girl, like a daughter to me, and to all those parents who hate when someone compares their dog to a child, get over it. Because she really is. Special. Angel, I love you!

Day 5 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for my friends, who are more than that – they are my family. I have the best friends in the world, all over the world (seriously, I miss a few in Japan and Germany who still haven’t come back to visit). Growing up, my friends were the ones I leaned on, played with, laughed with, cried with and grew with. They were the ones who would always be there. Today, that is still the case! And while most of them are far away, they’re never far from my heart. (I didn’t mean for that to sound so cheesy, it just kind of happened.) My friends are my family, and they mean the world to me!

Day 6 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for writing. For me writing is like breathing. It is something that I have to do so much, or I won’t feel right. I won’t feel like myself. I write to entertain. I write to promote discussions, thoughts or ideas; or to explore or to understand, and yes I am guilty of the occasional social commentary. I write because I am compelled to do so, because I want to, and because I need to. I don’t know how not to write. I can’t see my life without writing as a core part of it. For better or for worse, I am a writer.

Day 7 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for reading. I love to read, I mean you don’t have to look much further than my blog to see just how much I love to read. I used to read for an escape from my life, or to feel happy, and not so alone. I read to laugh, cry, and live so many other lives vicariously through the characters in those books. Now I read for that, but also for the simple sake of learning information or to be moved by beautiful prose. You know you have it bad for books, when you read something just for its beautiful descriptions and lines that make you go, “Whoa.”

Day 8 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for indoor plumbing. This may seem silly, but it is the reason I can’t camp. My one requirement (always) is that there must be indoor plumbing. So a camper is fine, I am great in the wilderness so long as I have acceptable facilities and running water. This is one reason I have never gone camping with my husband, because you know he does it for real. 😛

Day 9 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for our home. I love our house. I fell in love with it on Zillow, before I had even seen it in person. It is like the house was built just for us. We each have our own office (mine has red walls and wall to wall built-in book cases and a desk, no joke) and it is just enough space to grow into without being wasteful. I love the areas we have furnished and those that await our finishing touches. (Also heated floors in the master bath is not a bad thing for someone who hates the cold!) I am so thankful we found our house, and for every day we live in it, and make it a little more us.

Day 10 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for my husband’s family. I am not close to my family because most of them are crazy (like actually in a criminal way) so I have never had actual blood relatives and family mean the same thing before. But my husband’s family is wonderful. Not as in they are on some pedestal – each has their faults, and there are issues or squabbles here and there (and a few “bad seeds” who preach “un-family” things) but deep down they love each other, unconditionally. Someone needs something and the others will always come running. They laugh, cry, bicker and celebrate each other and you can feel the love radiate. They are everything I thought families should be, and something I know is rare to find. They welcomed me into their fold, and I am forever grateful for the second chance at having a real family.

Day 11 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for children. I hope one day my husband and I have our own brood (I’m Irish so think soccer team haha). I love kids and think they are so, so amazing. They pick up on so much more than people realize – the way that they think and see the world humbles and inspires me at the same time. They will always be out future, and their children their future… so much potential and great things await when you’re at the beginning. 🙂

Day 12 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I mean for me this was not just a show, it was a way of life. Whenever I am at my worst, I watch Buffy and it is hard to explain, but I just feel better – it’s like therapy. I am not one of those crazed fans who can’t separate real life from the show, or the actors from the characters they play, but I know everything there is to know about the show. I always related to Buffy and what she was going through, having to deal with so much and how she handled herself – how she related to other people and the world at large. W.W.B.D. – What Would Buffy Do. 😉

Day 13 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for chocolate. I mean I can’t even think about getting through the day without lots of chocolate. For some people, they need a cigarette, a glass of wine, or coffee, but give me some chocolate and I’m good. I have a deep love affair with chocolate. It’s not just a treat to me – it’s a necessity!

Day 14 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for Facebook. I know this might seem lame – I mean there are many annoying things about Facebook (if one more person asks me to play Candy Crush…) but I love it because it allows me to reconnect and stay connected to so many wonderful people. I have a lot of friends who live far away (like almost all of them) so Facebook allows me to talk to them and see what is going on with their lives, like I’m there. And it has been great when it comes to tracking down old friends from elementary school or old jobs from more than ten years ago. Perfect for introverted me – I can be social from a distance. 😉

Day 15 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for the bare necessities. Food, water, shelter and a general security are things that should never be taken for granted, and I am so thankful for all of them. Growing up, many of these things at one time were not a given. I grew up in a home, where the streets were safer, and often the choice I made in attempts to avoid violence or other toxic elements, and when I had to do that food also became an issue. I have never given a homeless person money, but I have always offered to buy them a meal. Because I understand, and I am grateful that I am in the place I am now, a place where I don’t worry about these things anymore. That is something to be grateful for.

Day 16 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for the freedom of expression. I love expressing myself, through my clothes, through what I say and what I do. Through writing and cooking and baking and decorating… (Everything I have like furniture or clothes I have a hand in designing or making – almost everything for our wedding, same thing – much to my husband’s dismay at times.) I don’t know what I would do if I could no longer express myself through creative outlets. And I am grateful for the freedom to do just that.

Day 17 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for the music I remember. I love music, and I miss hearing it, now that I am unable to anymore. But I hold onto the memories of songs that moved me: anthems that made me feel empowered, sad love songs that made me feel less alone, angry love songs that made me feel validated, happy songs that made me feel light. When artists I once loved come out with new albums I wish that I could hear their new music, but I am also incredibly grateful I was ever able to hear them. And when I remember that music, I can’t help but smile and feel it all again.

Day 18 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for good TV. I am not a couch potato but I love TV, or good TV. It can seriously creep me out of move me, or make me laugh when I need to or do all of the things that a good movie can, but because of its serial nature, I can make lasting attachments to characters, which makes me become more invested overall in what I’m watching. So, I may not watch tons of TV, but I certainly appreciate the TV I find the time to enjoy.

Day 19 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for surprises. I love to be surprised (fine print: as long as it is a good surprised a.k.a. one planned by someone else) but it doesn’t happen all that often. So when I am genuinely surprised by something – whether it is a big thing like a surprise dinner or plans, or whether it is a small thing like flowers for no reason – being surprised puts a smile on my face every time!

Day 20 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for self-reflection and awareness. I am big on personal growth. I am always in my own head, and always setting challenging expectations for myself: physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I think self-awareness is the true key to happiness in one word. Be aware of who you are and who you want to be and bridge the gap – not for anyone else, just for yourself. Balance is key, and I have grown so much in the last few years… I am excited to see how I grow next and welcome every experience that brings me closer to that growth.

Day 21 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for college (not so much the cost of college). If I had the money I could be a professional student. I love college, not just the classes or the learning, but the people and the opportunities. I love the atmosphere, a large melting pot of all kinds of people coming together, meeting each other, becoming friends, forging alliances, exchanging ideas… when it really feels like you can change the world. I am thankful for that. The student loans on the other hand… 😛

Day 22 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for our neighbors. We seriously won the lottery when it comes to the people who live close to us. They are the kind of people who are nice and watch out for you because they care and are genuinely good people. We often surprise each other with baked goods or watch each other’s houses when one of us travels. If we ever move, I hope we can take all of our neighbors with us! 😉

Day 23 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for my nieces and nephew. I love my nieces and nephew, and I am in awe of all of them. I love spending time with them, however exhausting they may be. My nephew is such a cuddler and lover boy, his twin sister is a wild, independent woman – you tell her she can’t and she will show you she can. Their younger sister who was just born two months ago, well, I can’t wait to see the person she becomes. They’re like our training wheels when it comes to having kids of our own – and that’s just the bonus!

Day 24 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for my experiences. Experience is the best teacher, both good and bad – what to do again, and never even try again. Some of my experiences have been hard, others painful and others incredibly wonderful and a complete joy… and I am thankful for all them, because they help me grow as a person, and my failures and lost opportunities are lessons I can learn from, and grow from.

Day 25 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for the little things. For me it is always about the little things. Watching TV with my husband, and just being around each other… a random chocolate bar, a sweet text or email or the simplest gestures from neighbors and friends… those are the things that get to me the most. The (typically) free, “I was thinking about you” things. The contentedness with everything and nothing at the same time. The little things are usually the most memorable, thoughtful and beautiful of all.

Day 26 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for the ability (and security with self) to be silly. I have come to find that I can be a really ridiculous person at times. I like to make jokes or sing horribly off key or have conversations with someone else, only they’re not there, in front of another person almost as a gag. I like being silly. It makes me feel light, and I thankful for the times I feel comfortable enough being silly. Because when you’re being silly, you look even sillier.

Day 27 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for every day of my life that does not involve a hospital visit or medical crisis. This may sound odd, but for someone who has had so many brain surgeries, heart surgeries and all of these other freak medical conditions and issues (broken bones, autoimmune disease, kidney failure, bone marrow disorder, stomach disorder, blood mutations, and the list goes on) going a couple of months without a medical mishap is worthy of a celebration and almost unheard of. Going a year without major surgery of some sort or a trip to an emergency room even rarer, so much that I don’t celebrate them out loud, afraid the universe will decide I’m due again. I have to be hooked up to machines at least every ten to twelve weeks if nothing bad is going on for my bone marrow disorder treatments, and I will gladly take this as normal. Any days when I don’t have to go to the hospital or have surgery or be hooked up to something or go through any kind of treatment… so, so THANKFUL.

Day 28 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for sugar highs. I have a serious sweet tooth – just ask anyone who knows me. But I also am the most productive when I am on a sugar high. I get more writing done, multitask better – I seriously rock. Who needs caffeine when you’re high on some sweets? Now excuse me while I have myself some sugar… 😉

Day 29 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for potential. I am a planner; I like to know what is going to happen or what could happen, and that will never change. But I am also thankful for all of the wonderful things that could happen or that something that is happening now could turn into. I am happy for all of the things that will be and can be that I’m not aware of yet.

Day 30 of Thankfulness: I am thankful for love. Is this a copout? It might seem this way, but I honestly think that love is it. The meaning of life, what makes things worth it, something to strive for and protect and maintain. A life full of love is the fullest kind of life. What’s love got to do with it? Everything my friend. Everything.

If you made it to the end, I am seriously impressed. I am sorry for all the cheese, but remember I warned you! 😉

It’s good to be aware of what to be thankful for – so you never take something or someone for granted. I think it makes a person happier too! 🙂

-DMW